December 10th 2016. RIP

This has got to be the WORST year I have ever had in my life. Bor Bor... passed away. My world didn't just turn upside down, but shattered into a million pieces. It wasn't easy growing up in a dysfunctional family for me before she came into my life. I would constantly cry by myself in my room, and I always kept things to myself because of my childhood. I found happiness in raising this adorable kitten that I found in the backyard. We started sharing a bed at night and doing every little thing at home together. It all changed when we moved to Union City, I got my first boyfriend and my parents only allowed them to stay in the garage. Our interaction had lessened a lot, but I still checked up on her daily or so. I did decide to take veterinarian assistant class at this time, in order to learn how to care for her properly. This proved to be helpful in the last few months when I was caring for her. My time with her significantly lessened after I started college and working concurrently, and I'd play with her once a week or maybe sometimes twice a month. I finally moved out to college and I took her along with me. I wasn't used to her marking territory everywhere and puking at first; however, I was able to adjust to it and even changed my entire lifestyle to fit hers. I started vacuuming a few times a week, reading labels before buying her food, buying quality cat litter. After living with her a few years, I became more health conscious and switched over to natural cleaning products slowly for our health. I thought she would live for at least 16 years because I felt like I was doing my best to take care of her. I scooped daily because Davis was hot and the bacteria growth rate would be sped up due to that. I never fed her junk during the 5 years we lived together. She got her regular checkups, so I was really shocked when her health deteriorated so quickly in the last few days. None of the treatments were able to control her attacks. I watched helplessly and in the back of my mind, I knew she probably had a few days left and I was right... I didn't want to be right god damn it. I haven't been able to sleep ever since her condition seemed to have worsened. I got sick from stress and lack of sleep, then was hit with a mild fever two days in a row. Bor Bor still managed to jump on me a few times to check on me, even though she WAS actually very sick herself. How could she love me so much? That unconditional love... so pure and authentic which is one of the reasons why I have a lot of love for her. I didn't want to give up even though she didn't respond to two treatments. I had her get supportive care before bringing her back home to have my family see her one last time. In the back of my head, I want to blame myself for many little things and beat myself up for it. I know the reality is 14 yo for a cat isn't young and she's been through a lot with me. The only time she's made me sad is today, but I have never been upset at her for destroying my tangible things or what not. Those things are replaceable any time, but not my time and bond with her. I always told my family that... I didn't mind her marking and cleaning because I can always buy a new one or clean up. What's the point of getting mad especially when it's her instinct. I can't explain how much I love her and I've done a lot of things physically to show it. I know she knows it. I was always so proud of her calmness whenever I took her to vet for checkups. I will always love you Bor Bor. I don't think I'd ever want another cat or pet in my life. My heart hurts so much at this point, and I really can't sleep. I thought maybe I'd feel a sense of relief after she had passed because it would mean for her to be in a better place and not suffering. I do slightly, but I feel more grief and pain than anything else. I know these emotions are normal, but I hope I can cope....

Rest In Peace And Some Random Crap

 Rest in peace my dear Happy, I was able to see her a few days before she passed away. She licked me as soon as I opened the door, I have had this sweetheart for three years, so I was quite traumatized when I received a text on her decease. Sigh, I would give her treats all the time and she would carry it back to her little crate. I was there when Mimi gave birth to her and Taco. My dear happy... Sorry Mama was not there to help.

 Lucy's farewell party. Fun fun and fun. She should be in Korea by now.

 I have been wanting a Cup No FUCHIKO. It would be fun to place them in my foodie pics. Haha, they are so fricking cute.

I decided to give the L'oreal power moisture rush mask a shot after seeing the price tag of the Keratase's MASQUE NUTRI-THERMIQUE. FRICKING $62 USD, god damn! The Keratase mask is my Holy Grail, but ugh... just not now!!! The L'oreal mask smells hella good, but does not do a decent job at making my hair feel moisturized. It was dirt cheap though compared to Keratase. -__-;; There is a lot of product in the L'oreal jar, so I guess you do get your money's worth. I believe this mask cost me $5.99 USD.

A shot of myself... A lot of people like this head band and this is the head band from Kiki's Delivery Service. Miyazaki has came out with another animation, I am dying to watch it.

I got a blood test today and yes.. I almost fainted after seeing the needles.

I was given the opportunity to do a few acts of kindness today. On my way out after my blood test, I saw a girl crying,  I took a few steps forward and stopped, then handed her tissue and made sure she was okay. The second incident was I saw a lady with her driver door half closed, so I caught up to her car, honked and yelled it out to her. I had fun doing so. Haha. I am NOT trying to brag or whatsoever, but you never know what impact you'd make on someone else's life. For example, what if the lady's door swung open and injured someone? What ifs.... the list goes on. I guess my point is to encourage you all to perform random act of kindness whenever possible. Hehehehehehe. ^_^